Beyond its fun and flirty appearance, Date In The Lyf is really a post about perspective, and the different ways in which we interact with on another in this crazy world. In the case of paying for dinner dates, both Rupa and myself have had similar experiences, but when it comes to commitment, our stories seriously diverge.

I won’t speak for Rupa’s upbringing, but as a sheltered Catholic school kid I was educated about the opposite sex in a manner that seemed to leave more questions than answers. While I will save my awkward experiences for another post another day, this post is one regarding the early stages of a “relationship” (I’m not capable of writing that word without quotes, deal with it) so I will instead out myself as one unfamiliar with that word.

Sure, I had an ongoing “relationship” with a girl in high school, but the term “make out kids” would have been more appropriate. I had a definite emotional connection with the girl, but it was a teenage mindset I hardly associate myself with any longer.

As a young adult, however, the word “relationship” has come back into my psyche, demanding it be used or at least addressed as the reigning label for the act of relating to someone on an ongoing basis. If this sounds complicated, it’s because it is (for me, at least). I can’t think of a “relationship” without Sartre-izing the concept, breaking it down into actions and meaning. But that is a dangerous game. Or so I learned the day I referred to a “small-r” relationship I once (thought I) was in.

Grammar aside, it turns out a capital-R may have been warranted.

But once those words were out of my mouth, it was too late. Like Drake releasing the video to “Hotline Bling” there was nothing I could do but sit back and suffer the consequences of what I had done. There would be no coming back from this. 

Now I won’t sit here and tell myself that the woman in question was ready to make a wood carving in my likeness, but if there was such an idol, my de-capitalization of the “relationship” ensured there was only one more “date” left to have: one with a wood chipper.